Middle East violence brings close friendship to an abrupt end

Special to The Acorn


KILLED IN JERUSALEM--Marla Bennett, right, died in the July 31 bombing at Hebrew University in Israel. Barri Worth, left, a Calabasas resident and CHS grad, was a close friend of Bennett.

KILLED IN JERUSALEM–Marla Bennett, right, died in the July 31 bombing at Hebrew University in Israel. Barri Worth, left, a Calabasas resident and CHS grad, was a close friend of Bennett.

It was the summer of 1995 and I was swimming in the pool at Camp JCA Shalom in Malibu with several other 12-year-olds and our counselor, Marla Bennett.


Marla, with whom I had become close friends, joined me in nicknaming each other after our favorite foods. She became "Marla-Cheesecake" and I became "Half-Baked-Barri." We joked about the nicknames and cherished the fun memory for years to come.


But Marla Bennett was killed in the July 31 bombing at Hebrew University in Jerusalem while pursuing her dream to become a Jewish educator. She loved Israel and loved studying there.


All that I am left with to remind me of this truly remarkable person are the memories, photographs and letters that we shared.


As I reflect over those 10 years of friendship, I am flooded with a mixture of emotions. First, I feel a sense of pride and gratitude that Marla was a part of my life.


I want to declare to the world how privileged I am to have known her and to have been her friend. But I cannot disregard the denial, frustration, confusion, and unparalleled grief I am experiencing due to her death. Marla did not leave us naturally. She was taken––brutally. It is truly tragic that someone with such a zest for life and a smile that could spread happiness everywhere has been robbed of the opportunity to experience life at its fullest.


Those who did not know Marla would have been charmed by her.


Marla was not only a dear friend, but a role model. Since I am the oldest sibling in my family, Marla became my older sister in a sense. She would send me cards throughout the school year, telling me about college life and her plans to study in Israel, and I would eagerly write her back telling her about the middle school drama in my life.


We continued to correspond throughout my high school years, and in a postcard dated Feb.7, 2001, Marla confirmed her happiness.


"I am having an amazing year in Israel…I am learning so much and I absolutely love living in Jerusalem," she wrote.


I was thrilled when I learned in that same postcard that Marla would be returning to camp last summer, giving us a wonderful opportunity to reconnect. Both older now, we related to each other even more. Instead of hanging out with all the other counselors after the kids had gone to sleep, we would drive around camp together taking care of chores, or chat in her room until neither of us could keep our eyes open.


Eventually, I earned the title of "M.I.T," or Marla-In-Training, because of our similar personalities and my admiration for her as a person and a friend. I considered itan honor when people jokingly called me "Little Marla."


Among other attributes, Marla was perhaps the most organized person I knew. In the camp office last summer, amid the candy, Ping-Pong balls, markers, compact discs, and more, Marla’s desk was impeccably clean with her belongings clearly labeled. She adorned her computer with written reminders to herself, in neat penmanship of course.


After summer ended, she sent me a picture of the two of us on a postcard, another example of her creativity. On the back she wrote, "To the only person I would EVER want to be called M.I.T.— Don’t get too good at my job…I want to come back some time, okay? I adore you, and I am so glad we got to reconnect this summer. You are a very special individual. Enjoy this picture."


I framed the picture and kept it on my desk at school the entire year. I use the picture whenever I want to explain to somebody the true meaning of friendship.


In February, Marla came home to San Diego where I attend college and we made it a point to catch up on old times. She treated me to coffee on February 14th, and I helped her shop for the Shabbat dinner she was preparing. We drove up to Los Angeles together two weeks later because we knew neither of our mothers would want us to ride alone.


That was the last time I saw Marla Bennett.


Not once did I think that I would have to attend her funeral on August 5. I had hoped to hear news of a possible wedding, but never a funeral.


I used to e-mail Marla every time I heard about the bombings in Israel to make sure she was okay. On Wednesday, July 31st, I was sitting in the movie theater with my family waiting for the movie Austin Powers to start. My mom informed me of the Hebrew University bombing and I reminded myself to contact Marla as soon as I got home.


A terrible phone call informing me of her death came first, and I rushed over to camp early the next morning to seek solace among other grief-stricken friends.


That same day, Sol Lipman, the previous Director of Camp JCA Shalom and a mutual friend of ours, told me how such violence was "the antithesis of her personality." Marla was the epitome of kindness and love, he said.


Marla would have been so touched if she saw how the Jewish community united in her honor and especially how her friends and loved ones provided such support for one other during the difficult time.


Monday night after the funeral, all of her camp friends from San Diego, Los Angeles, Northern California, Texas, the East Coast, Canada and Israel came together to share old pictures and stories, both laughing and crying while they remembered their fallen friend.


The only person missing from the reunion was Marla herself, but we felt her presence nonetheless.


We have been truly blessed by your life, my friend. You are an inspiration to all of us, Marla Cheesecake, and I miss now and always.


Barri Worth is a 2001 Calabasas High School graduate and currently attends the University of California-San Diego.




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