Family adapts with adopted daughter




ALL IN THE FAMILY—Curtis Webster shares a happy moment with his adopted daughter, Trang, who was born in Vietnam.

ALL IN THE FAMILY—Curtis Webster shares a happy moment with his adopted daughter, Trang, who was born in Vietnam.

The adoption of an infant is an adjustment for any parent, but when an older child is adopted and moves to a new country to live with strangers, the transition period is also difficult for the child.

Such was the case for Trang Huynh, a Vietnamese child who, at the age of 11, was adopted by Agoura Hills pastor Curtis Webster and his wife, Kay.

The Websters had some experience with adoption. They have a blended family of seven children, including daughter Maly, a Cambodian child they adopted when she was 14 months old. Both Maly and Trang, whose name has been changed to Trang Elizabeth Webster, are now 17.

In 2007, the Websters learned about an adoption program through Dillon International called “Waiting Children,” which helps older children who are waiting to be adopted. Many of the children also have health or disability issues. For instance, Trang is almost completely blind in one eye.

The program led the Websters to an orphanage in the An Giang province of Vietnam. While flipping through pictures of waiting children at the orphanage, the couple were attracted to a photo of Trang.

“I got to the picture of Trang and I said, ‘stop,’” Curtis Webster said. “That’s our girl. There was something in her smile, something in what she projected that made me say, ‘She’s ours.’”

They adopted her in 2008.

But Trang was not happy about it. She had a happy life at the orphanage with lots of friends and caring teachers.

“I had people who took care of me like their own child,” she said. “They put me first.”

“She really didn’t want to be adopted,” Webster said. “She really didn’t want to leave.”

Six years have passed since Trang joined the Webster family in Agoura Hills. She reminisced about the difficulty she had adjusting to a new family.

“When I was alone with them we had nothing to say,” Trang said. “They didn’t speak Vietnamese well,” and Trang was just learning how to speak English.

Webster said the first year with Trang was very rough, and she acted out in dangerous ways.

“The head banging was scary,” he said. “She could have hurt herself.”

Trang said she enjoyed cursing at her family in Vietnamese. Webster said that even though he didn’t know exactly what she was saying to him, he understood the message by her tone of voice.

A year’s worth of counseling and a made-up game helped Trang and her family get in sync emotionally.

Webster discovered that Trang enjoyed playing basketball, so in an effort to connect to his daughter they shot balls into hoops and created a game they called “moonguyen,” a nonsense word that made sense only to the players.

Moonguyen had just one rule—Trang was the only one who could make or enforce a rule, which led to silliness on the court and a growing bond between father and daughter.

Trang started to thrive at school and with her friends and family.

She plays the piano and flute, and will be a member of the choir and the band at Agoura High School in the fall. She has earned a black belt in karate, and she has made many friends.

At the orphanage, Trang took care of the younger children. Now she works with children at We Rock the Spectrum, an Agoura Hills children’s gym. She also helps teach younger kids karate.

A novel idea

Moonguyen is now the name of a novel that Webster and Trang wrote together.

“Moonguyen: A Two-Way Tale of Adoption” is a fictionalized account of the adoptive journey that the Webster clan experienced.

The story is about Cam, an only child who has issues with a depressive adoptive mother, who, Trang said, is nothing like Kay Webster, who has been loving and supportive through every challenge.

Curtis Webster’s fictionalized persona is a self-absorbed basketball coach he called Randy Hartman. In the story neither Cam nor Randy want a relationship, unlike the authors of the book.

Trang said she came up with the idea of writing a book with her father.

“I felt like I wanted to invite the world into my story,” she said. “I felt like people didn’t understand my life.”

She said the most surprising aspect of her journey through adoption was that Webster refused to give up on her.

He knew that the tide had turned in their relationship when Trang started to talk about problems she was having at school.

“It hit me that she was confiding in me, trusting me. It was a humbling moment. She’s really my daughter now,” said Webster.

The book is ultimately about trust between parents and children.

“Moonguyen: A Two Way Tale of Adoption” is available on Amazon.

Webster says writing the book was its own reward.

“If I didn’t sell a single copy it would have been more than worth it,” he said. “We got into each other’s heads.”


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