Longtime counselor helps students grow

WENDY PIERRO/Acorn NewspaperTess Wilkoff A guidance counselor for 20 years at Oak Park High School, Tess Wilkoff has helped hundreds of students with issues such as class advisement and crisis counseling. She has mediated between students and between teachers and students. She has helped teens who were worried about grades and about transitioning to college.

Wilkoff works with families, providing resources and referrals; writes college, job and internship recommendation letters for students; heads a study team of parents, students and teachers that addresses strategies for student success; is on the school leadership team and the district safety task force.

Wilkoff created and runs the Peer Counseling program, in which students mentor one another.

"There are so many hats we wear. The variety is what keeps the jobs interesting," Wilkoff said.

She remembers past students and takes pride in positively influencing their lives.

"I don't take that for granted. It gives a lot back to me," Wilkoff said. "As a counselor I always try to be a role model for being a respectful person, respecting other people's rights."

When Peer Counseling was established in 1988 there were eight students involved. Today there are 46 advanced peer counselors chosen from 80 applicants, and 100 beginning peer counselors expected in the fall.

Peer counselors organize campuswide events such as Acceptance Week, which promotes the importance of being open to all backgrounds and ideas.

Peers supporting peers is "a very powerful tool we give them, acknowledging the influence they have on each other," Wilkoff said. "It brings out the best in them when they know that there are adults who trust them with each other."

In the early years of the program the issues teens were primarily concerned with were boyfriend/girlfriend or parent conflict. Today pressures are more complex, and students are more reserved about problems, Wilkoff said.

"I've had to work harder to gain the trust of kids," Wilkoff said. "Peer counselors who are explicitly trained to report those kinds of things really become the eyes and ears for all of the counselors."

Maintaining the quality of the program will be difficult, particularly with current budgetary constraints, Wilkoff said.

"There is no question . . . academics is a priority," Wilkoff said.

Another ongoing goal is to keep the program fresh by keeping what works and finding new ways to address needs, she said.

"It's a studentdriven program, so I have to continue listening to the kids and giving them the confidence to try new things," Wilkoff said.

A native of Youngstown, Ohio, Wilkoff attended Miami University in Oxford, Ohio, then the National College of Education in Evanston, Ill., majoring in elementary education with a minor in social sciences. In Wilkoff's first job teaching a challenging sixth-grade class in Chicago, students often shared their problems with her.

"I loved teaching, but it was pretty quick that I identified that my calling was counseling," Wilkoff said.

At that same Chicago school, Wilkoff later taught a combination class of difficult fourth-, fifth- and sixth-graders.

"We operated as a family. The older kids loved mentoring the younger ones, and the younger ones loved having the attention from the older ones," Wilkoff said.

The success of that program created the basis for Wilkoff's future Peer Counseling program.

Wilkoff earned her master's in counselor education from Cleveland State University. After moving to South Carolina, Wilkoff stopped working for four years to raise her first child. The family eventually moved to Tucson, Ariz., where Wilkoff got a job as a middle school counselor.

"I think the middle school arena lends itself to this peer support because it's such a challenging time in their lives," Wilkoff said.

Wilkoff and her family moved to Oak Park in 1988, and she began working at Oak Park High. She was the only counselor for both Medea Creek Middle School and Oak Park High, which shared one campus. Wilkoff immediately established the Peer Counseling program.

"The challenge was making the leap from middle to high school and dealing with the constraints, demands and busyness of the high school schedule," Wilkoff said.

Wilkoff has raised her son and daughter and two stepchildren, who all live in the Bay area. After her first husband died, she was a single parent for six years.

Fellow counselor Debi Fries calls Wilkoff "a pragmatic visionary."

"Under her guidance and tutelage our students learn to take risks, discover their strengths and passions, find their voice and be of service to their fellow peers," Fries said. "Our students are indeed lucky to be the recipients of her guidance, wisdom, creativity and constant inspiration, and so am I."