Did you call your father today?

Rabbi Paul Kipnes, left, and Temple Or Ami congregant Don Weston Honor your father and mother. It made the Top Ten (commandments), coming in at No. 5, between the commandments about our relationship with God and spirituality and those about how we treat other people. It made it into the Holiness Code: You shall revere your mother and father, appearing right after God tells Moses to tell us to be holy.

The way we treat our parents tells us more about the character of a person than the words he speaks or the gifts she brings. Looking for a spouse or partner for the long haul? Watch how he or she treats his/her parents.

Wondering if your children will treat you well when you get older? Just look in the mirror and observe how you treat your parent(s). After all, we are the role models for our own children.

I call my father every morning, usually at 8:15 a.m., right after I drop the kids off at school. Why? Because he likes hearing what is happening in our lives. Because he enjoys the conversation. Because I love him. Because I want my kids to follow my lead and call me regularly when I get older. And as a small way to repay the debt I owe him because this wonderful man spent his adult life working, stressing, supporting my siblings and me. It is the least I can do.

Yes, I call my mother also, plenty.

Or Ami congregant Don Weston, 83, of Woodland Hills, says that elderly parents want to stay connected with their children and their families.

"Aside from respect, kindness and consideration, we need to know what's going on in your life. We need to know the little things that happen in our family," Weston said. "We need to know that we haven't been put out to pasture or placed on the back burner. We need to be in touch. Most of all, we don't want to feel forgotten. At the same time, we don't want to bother you."

The Or Ami Center for Jewish Parenting recently gathered adults together for a discussion about how to parent one's parents. Those who attended said it was intense, because the emotions surrounding the aging of parents can be intense.

Can we prepare ourselves for the inevitable process of watching our parents age? How can we hold onto the sacredness of who they are and what they have meant to us?

Rabbi Kipnes leads Congregation Or Ami in Calabasas. He can be reached at (818) 880-4880 or www.rabbipaul.blogspot.com.