Moms need to put themselves back on the important to-do list

For many women, an important rite of passage is becoming a mother. However, often after the baby is born, the focus shifts, and routines that were once rituals are forgotten.

While it's not surprising that their children and families come first, a new report of 3,000 U.S. moms reveals that although most (76 percent) agree it's just as important for mothers to take care of themselves as their families, nearly eight in 10 moms don't do enough.

One of the biggest things falling by the wayside is a sense of feeling and looking beautiful. Eighty-four percent admit they've let their appearance slide since becoming a mom and that taking care of their appearance has become more of a wish than a reality. The majority (66 percent) say guilt is one of the barriers to self-care.

Can motherhood and womanhood coexist? Suave developed the "Motherhood vs. Womanhood Report" to understand the many tradeoffs women face when they become moms and the consequences for their sense of womanhood. The study was conducted in partnership with Dr. Kathleen Gerson, New York University professor of sociology. The study also probed the benefits that occur when moms do put themselves back on the to-do list.

The report reveals that about onethird of moms believe that being a mother and being a woman actually conflict. One in four can't remember the last time they did something that made them feel like a woman, and 42 percent report it was more than a month ago.

The report also found that:

•Although 67 percent of moms would rather get their pre-baby body back than their prebaby sex life, exercise opportunities are tough to come by.

•Sixty-six percent admit they sometimes don't have enough time to take a shower or bath.

•Some 80 percent have gone weeks or months without a haircut, even though they felt they needed one.

•More than half, 53 percent, say that they've forgotten to brush their teeth in the morning.

"I'm not surprised that there's a conflict felt between being a woman and being a mother," said Gerson. "Mothers remain key caregivers who are relied upon heavily by the whole family. But moms also need to look out for themselves, which means doing things that help them keep an identity of their own apart from the role of mom."

When moms do take care of themselves, 93 percent say it makes them feel good. Moms who take care of themselves report they feel happier (76 percent), more attractive (76 percent) and more self-confident (72 percent). Taking care of themselves made 60 percent feel more feminine and slightly more than half feel like they are setting a good example for their children.

What else makes moms feel good? According to the study, eight in 10 married moms admitted nothing made them feel prettier than a compliment from their husband.

This story is provided by North American Precis Syndicate Inc.